When I was pregnant I went through bouts of loneliness. I assumed once I got pregnant then my friends who already had kids and I would hang out and drink champs all day as we watched Netflix. That wasn’t the case. Some people didn’t call or text me back, I never really hung out with anyone. Initially, i was angry and hurt. Then I realized I had to find my mom tribe, women who were in the same place in life.
One thing I found out is that just because someone is your friend doesn’t mean they should be in your mom tribe, and that’s okay. There are just some things in life you can’t share with everybody. That’s not what your tribe should be. You should be able to share your fears or worries without anyone passing judgment on you.
When we start building our tribe we want friends who can not only relate to us, but will be understanding of what we are going through. I remember posting on Facebook about breastfeeding being hard for me. I used to sit up and cry about it. Someone commented how simple and easy it was for her. Oh okay. I tried to explain a little further about the effect it had on me. Nope, not her. She didn’t know what about it made it so hard. Um okay.
I love my husband to death, he is my best friend. But there are some things I can’t really talk to him about because he just wouldn’t understand. Finding your mom tribe is about finding your support system. It’s not just about play dates (which I feel are so necessary) but someone you can keep it real with.
Your mom tribe will not pass judgment if you want a glass of champagne at 9 am. They will bring the bottles. When you feel like crying because you’ve failed as a parent, your tribe will come through and make you feel like the rock star that you are. Parenting skills will never be questioned by your mom tribe, because you are all in this together.
Since I’m somewhat of an introvert building my mom tribe has been a work in progress. Every now and then I encounter someone who can sit with us at the lunch table. But it’s all worth it. Having a mom tribe can save your sanity.
Do you have a mom tribe? How did you find your mom tribe? Share your mom tribe stories with me!
Until Next Time!