After I had my son I suffered from anxiety and postpartum depression. I have finally gotten to a point where I am comfortable talking about it, but more importantly, I’ve started focusing on my self-care. What I have learned is that if I’m not okay my family won’t be okay. Over the past few years so much has changed in my life. All of it has been positive changes though. Even cutting people off was a good thing. I’m happier now than I have ever been. I’m not saying I’m an expert or anything, but let me share some toxic habits you really should stop now!
Stop being a people pleaser
I’m not saying you have to be a jerk, but it’s okay to say no sometimes. There are some people out there who love to take advantage of others because they know they can get what they want. Don’t be that person. If you genuinely don’t want to do something just say no, AND don’t explain yourself. It doesn’t make you mean or a bad person.
Stop wanting what other people have
It’s easy to look at other people and think they have it good so you might start comparing yourself. What you don’t have always seems better than what you have, but you never know the truth of their situation. Those people might be miserable.
Stop doubting yourself
I know for myself as a first time mom I struggled with this a lot when my son was firstborn. It created so much anxiety. I just wanted to be PERFECT. Every time I did something I would second guess myself. I spent so much time googling stuff I was going crazy. Nobody is perfect and there isn’t a right or wrong way to be a parent, as long as you are loving and caring for your child.
Stop putting yourself last
Always make time for yourself. TREAT YO SELF! Sometimes we spend so much time taking care of our friends and family that we don’t even take time for ourselves. I read a meme once that said “the worst part about being strong is that no one ever asks if you’re okay.” If you don’t take care of yourself then no one else will.
Stop living in the past
We can’t control anything that already happened. All we can do is move on and learn from it. Not repeat the same mistakes we have made. This isn’t just about not being able to change what has happened in the past. But for a lot of us, we aren’t even the same people we used to be. I wanted better so I decided to do better.
Stop over thinking everything
Sometimes we are afraid of failure so we start thinking of ALL of the different scenarios or possibilities. You can even make yourself physically ill because of the anxiety you can get from overthinking. You will go crazy if you are always thinking about what you coulda, shoulda, woulda done.
I’ve said it before and I will say it again. If you are happy, your family will be happy. Surround yourself with people who uplift and believe in you. Remove negative people, negative energy, and breakup with toxic friends. Self-care isn’t just about your physical health it’s also about your mental health.
I’m sure there are plenty of other toxic habits you could benefit from letting go of. I’ve just given you a place to start.
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